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Crazy Gravity Falls Head Canon Go!

So I need at least one really out there head canon for whatever I watch and I’ve got my Gravity Falls one ready. Cute Biker is the mother of Manly Dan’s children.

Hear me out.

Manly Dan has three sons and Wendy, and they’ve all been seen in the show but there’s been no mention of their mother. Crazy head canon goes as follow: Their mother dies after last son is born and Manly Dan, being too manly to raise his children more or less recruits his friend/follower Cute Biker to take care of the children while he’s off cutting down trees or whatever.

Pictured: Manly Dan being damn manly.

After so long the kids just take to calling Cute Biker mom and he more or less lives with them while being Manly Dan’s biggest fan. Now that the kids are old enough to be hanging out with their friends or whatever he has more time to do whatever he does (like be cute and stalk Manly Dan) but he still makes dinner for the family every other night and tucks the kids in and such. That’s why he was fishing in the boat near Dan and the kids. (He’s not dumb enough to ride in the boat when Manly Dan’s fishing. That guy wrestles fish into submission.)

And that’s my new crazy head canon for Gravity Falls.

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